So Glad we signed up!

Two years ago, right at this time, I was reflecting on the craziness of our lives.  Well, it's still crazy around here.  But, I'm so glad we signed up for it!  And thankful that God brought us through all those crazy plans from 2 years ago!

From July 25, 2011:

So, already we're heading to Africa for 10 days

with 2 of our children,

for a total of 39 hours of in-flight time round-trip,

coordinating leaving 1 child behind in the U.S. with grandparents,

for longer than we've ever left any of our children,

to meet our 4th child,

a 2 year old (nearly 3 year old) we've never seen in person before,

but fully consider her our daughter none the less.

we'll appear in an Ethiopian courtroom and tell the judge we want to adopt her.

we will visit with our little girl a total of 3 times and then have to leave without knowing when we can go back for her.

i put together a photo book for her this past Sunday,

pictures of us, her new family, that the care center staff will give to her when we are officially hers!

we will tour 3 government orphanages,

we will spend 7 nights in a guesthouse with 50 degree F nights and no heat,

and hope we're not in the unlikely 50% of people who travel to this region and get traveler's diarrhea!

this weekend we purchased a backpack and stuffed it full of all kinds of things,

including a t-shirt from our hometown football team,

held it right up to the back of the 8 year old who lives in our home,

to see if it would be the right size for another 8 year old half a world away,

the backpack, shirt and goodies are for our Compassion child that the "odds are against us" actually getting to meet during this trip,

the backpack will go to Ethiopia (along with the mounds of diapers, wipes, and hand sanitizer orphanage donations) just in case we get to see him in person.

we'll spend time with our friend in the mission field and come face to face with great need.

so, why not add to the crazy?

we've made plans to fly from the capital city, Addis Ababa, north to Mekele, the area our new daughter is from.

It's an hour and a half flight, totally do-able as a day trip, right?

Only for crazies like us!

But, to see her heritage,

the chance to fill in some missing history from her past,

to visit the orphanage where she spent a month,

talk to the nannies that cared for her then,

to get to play with the kids at that orphanage who only rarely get visitors,

and to be able to deliver to them some donations to hopefully make their lives better,

sure, why not?

sign us up!

When the odds are against you

Still reflecting on 2 years ago, from July 28, 2011:

Remember this post about how I was told "the odds are certainly against you," when calling with only 2 weeks notice instead of the required 8 weeks to set up a visit with our Compassion child we sponsor in Ethiopia?

Well, God did it! Against the odds!!

I got an email today that a visit has been arranged for the Thursday we'll be in Ethiopia! Our 8 year old Compassion boy will travel with a chaperon to the city of Addis Ababa from his home in Awassa and we will get to spend a good part of the day with him. (Some day we'd love to travel to his hometown as it is supposed to be beautiful, but the logistics were too complicated on this trip.)

I really just cannot imagine the moment when the 8 year old boy from America who lives in our home every day meets our 8 year old boy from Ethiopia who we've written, prayed for and loved for years now, but only known through letters and pictures! Like a tiny picture of heaven when we'll all be united as one family.

I spent the morning taking my mom to tour a senior day center where she may begin going during the day when her husband is at work. Her Lewy Body Demetia has progressed to a point that it is very concerning for her to be home alone. It was tough. The center was amazingly great and the staff very friendly, but despite my good intentions my mom still accused me of trying to "put her in a nursing home". My kids went with us because it was too complicated to arrange a babysitter among the other Ethiopia travel-related madness. But the kids were a huge hit, all the seniors loved them and smiled huge smiles upon seeing them. I remarked to my husband later that I think most people touring the place with a parent don't bring small children with them because once a person gets to a point of needing a senior center for their mom, their children are usually grown.

As I returned home and was able to take off the happy face I'd plastered on for my mom's benefit, I was tempted to lament, "Why? Why has this disease claimed my mom so young? Most of the people in that senior center were 15 to 20 years older than she is! Most of my friends have moms who babysit their kids and generally provide them with a lot of support and help. I, however, must not only raise my children and run my household without my mom's help, I must help her."

Oh, yes, the pity-party was coming, but then I opened my email and amid children complaining over the lunch choices, a barking dog, an irritating intermittent Internet connection, and crumbs all over the floor, there it was. The email with God's amazing answered prayer that we could meet Mathews on this first trip to Ethiopia!

And instead I must ask, "Why? Why does God care so much for me to answer this prayer that began over a year ago? How is it that He has been so faithful to very distinctly show His presence in our lives so many times?"

I am unworthy to even play a bit part in His plan, unworthy of the divine arrangements that have been made so that next week we will not only meet our new daughter for the 1st time, but our Compassion son!

You better believe there will be some serious Texas-Sized Hugs in Ethiopia next week!!!

And hopefully pictures I can share with all of you the following week but until then this blog will likely be very quiet! Everyone who is praying for us, know that it means so much! More than you pray for our safety, pray that we will be His light. I am certain we will return from Africa changed and am thanking God for that. May we never be the same!

Remembering Two Years Ago

I'm a firm believer in remembering what God has done in my life.  So, I couldn't let the end of July pass without some awe over what happened 2 years ago.  That time waiting for our court date so we could go meet our Little Girl in Ethiopia was so hard, but that call with the news of our court date was easily one of the best phone calls of my life!

From July 15, 2011:

After my whiney, I'm not patient, we-don't-know-WHEN-we-will-even-get-to-meet-our-little-girl-in-Ethiopia post last night, we got a phone call at 9:15 am this morning with our court date! And it's August 2nd!!!!! Praise God for this amazing answered prayer!

We get to meet our little girl on Monday, August 1st!!!! Ahhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Really it is more shock than screaming going on here right now.

I mean can you even believe it? We will get on a plane and head to Ethiopia in just about 2 weeks to meet our 2 year old daughter for the first time!!!!

My husband had given up hope for a before rainy season court date (for those of you who don't live and breathe Ethiopian adoption news, the courts close for about 2 months every year, this year the closure is Aug. 8th-Oct. 3rd) by this past Monday, I still had hope but have to be honest that yesterday afternoon I really began to feel down that it wasn't going to happen, that we were going to have to wait until at least October to color with our little girl.

When I saw the 817 area code pop up on the phone this morning I had no idea if I was about to hear the amazing, wonderful news that we had a court date soon, or if it was going to be the sad news that our agency was now sure that we definitely wouldn't get in before the rainy season.

Our older 2 children will be traveling with us. The timing is perfect with their school not starting until Aug. 22nd, and our little 4 year old guy is super excited about spending a week with his Nana and Papa all to himself!!!

We are so thrilled and grateful for this news!

And we have a ton to do, it will be a busy next 2 weeks with all the travel prep. added on to the week of VBS (I'm teaching, our kids are going & we're taking a neighbor girl with us) plus the homestudy update we have early next week. If anyone has any travel advice, lay it on me! We've been thinking about this trip for nearly 2 years now and read tons of blogs from people who've done it, but now that it's really us getting to make travel arrangements and get ready, I feel like I've forgotten all I thought I knew!

But I like this hurry, hurry adoption phase much better than the wait, wait, and wait some more phase!

First World Problems Again

Two years ago we were about to travel to a third world country, Ethiopia, and now we are soon headed to a different third world country on a mission trip (more on that later), so I thought it fitting to bring back the First World Problems Rap.  I love it as much today as I did then!  Perspective changes everything!


My post from June 30, 2011:

I've been talking with my 8 year old about first world problems lately. In the past couple years as we've become more aware of the acute problems so many people living in 3rd world countries face every day, it's definitely changed our perspective on many of the "problems" in our American lives.

Which is a good thing, unless you happen to be one of our children!

Real life example of what I'm talking about:

The 8 year old son needed some new jeans and one evening this week I announced that he was coming with me to the Old Navy to try some on because what with all the choices -- 8 slim, 8 regular, 10 slim, 10 regular, boot cut, skinny, loose fit -- I had no idea which ones would fit him. He immediate began the whining (remember this is a new lovely phase we're in with the 8 year old), "Do I haaavvvve to go?"

To which I responded with a very exaggerated whining routine to mimic him that went something like this: "I cannot believe I have to get in the car and drive to a store that has tons of clothes to choose from, clothes my parents can afford to buy for me, stand in a dressing room in air conditioned comfort and TRY ON some jeans! I mean, seriously, does life get any worse?!!! Nevermind the fact that there are lots of children in this world with only one set of clothing to their name. A set of clothing they didn't get the luxury of trying on to see how it fit; it doesn't matter if it's too small or too big, they wear it because it's all they have!"

I'm not really sure if my little routine changed his perspective on his life, but he was laughing by the end of it, so at least the whining was put to an end!

Then tonight after the kids were in bed I found this little gem of a YouTube video. So hilariously convicting and illustrates exactly what I've been saying (by the way my smarty 8 year old of course wanted to know who are the "second world countries" when I was explaining about 1st and 3rd world countries)! I can't wait to show this video to my 8 year old tomorrow! (Double click to view it in full screen)

A Clue That You May Have A Lot Of Kids

While we were away in Florida, we had our kitchen cabinets painted inside and out, not a new color but refreshing the old.  I am loving the fresh, clean white paint.  But, we had to empty our cabinets before we left for our trip and then guess what was waiting for me when we returned?  Not only the beautiful new looking cabinets, but my bedroom floor completely full of the kitchen cabinet contents that had to be put back.  You don't realize how much kitchen stuff you have until you have to empty the cabinets!  

But, it was a good chance to clean-out things we don't need.  I put back the stuff we used most often first and then saw how great the cabinets looked being less cluttered so I wasn't at all motivated to put back the last of the stuff and was able to more easily get rid of it!  Now I probably ought to go through that painful process in my closet -- remove everything and then just put back the stuff I really use and love.

_____________________

I caught this sweet moment this week:

My 7 year old daughter reading to her baby doll.  So, so precious!  Can I just freeze time so that she never grows up?

_____________________ 

When we had an outside gate repaired at our house a couple days ago, the repairman made a comment about "all the kids" I had and then followed it up with another comment that indicated he thought I ran a daycare out of my home.  I didn't bother to tell him, "Nope they are all my children!"  But, I'm definitely going to have to add that to my list of signs that you may have a lot of children:  "People see you with your kids and assume you are running a daycare."  Check.

Really as a mother of both white and black children I hear quite a bit and have come to realize that not everyone needs to be corrected, sometimes it's best to just smile and nod, "Uh-huh."

The It Feels Like Chaos Daycare:

_____________________ 

Happy Friday Friends!

Find more Friday Fragments here.

Our Haircare Routine for My Ethiopian Daughter

I have really hesitated to write any sort of "how-to" related to my African daughter's hair because mostly I'm still far from an expert even 19 months into caring for her hair.  I've just barely learned enough to manage.  Also, there are far better resources than me on The Internet, and I am so thankful for them, one of my favorites being the awesome blog Chocolate Hair Vanilla Care.  She has wonderful tutorials on styles and in depth reviews of products.  For example, check out this entire post dedicated to sleep caps!

But, I do have friends in the adoption process or with kids newly home ask me what we do.  Recently, a friend who brought her daughter home around the same time we did our Little Girl asked me about managing the hair because her daughter was an infant when she came home and my friend has not had to do a whole lot to her hair yet, but now that the little girl is getting older she realizes she has to start doing more.  So, since I keep composing the same email to send out to friends with our basic hair routine, I thought I'd just post it here on the blog for easier reference.

Little Girl's fantastic curls that require an entirely different type of care than my super straight, oily hair:

Here's what I sent my friend a couple weeks ago when she asked for hair help:

Oh the hair!  It is such a learning process and I'm still learning!  But, here's what we do:

Wash with conditioner only (Aubrey Organics Honeysuckle Rose - I buy it at drugstore.com) once a week. I kinda scrub with the conditioner on then leave it on for about 10 minutes while she plays in the tub. Then I detangle her hair by combing through it with a wide-tooth comb (like this one). The detangling is pretty hard if she's had a free hair style (can take 20-25 minutes or so). If she's had braids or twists in then the detangling is pretty easy (more like 5 minutes). Wash with shampoo (Kinky Curly Brand) only about once a month and do that step before the conditioner. After detangling I rinse out the Aubrey Organics Conditioner and then pat dry her hair with an old t-shirt (towels make it more frizzy). Then I put on a leave in conditioner like Kinky Curly Knot Today Conditioner (you can buy this at Target or various places on the web) or if I'm going to do braids or twists I'll put on Shea Moisture brand Raw Shea Butter Restorative Conditioner.

She sleeps in a sleep cap and on a satin pillowcase (probably overkill but I need all the help I can get to keep the hair nice!). And for swimming I typically convince her to wear a silicone swim cap. Also in an attempt to keep the styles nice, all the dress-up princess crowns have disappeared from our dress-up bin (a sad truth, but not as sad as snagging a style that took me over an hour to do).

If I do a style with lots of little braids, it can last several days (we've gone as long as 2 weeks before). I can even wash the hair with the braids in. I just rub conditioner on the scalp and then squeeze some through the braids with my hands and rinse. On non-wash days, if we have free hair, it takes a lot of adding moisture (like more leave-in conditioner or some oil) both at night and in the morning. I use coconut oil, sometimes, but jojoba oil seems to work best for us. For non-wash days when she has braids or twists in, I typically just have to put a little jojoba oil on the part lines once a day.

The braids and twists take a while to put in (for making part lines the pin tail comb is your friend) but they are much easier to maintain day to day. With free hair her hair gets so tangled and dry and also if she gets any sand or grass in it, then it is so hard to get out! With braids, the sand and grass and debris doesn't stick in her hair.

Here's a braid style:

And this is "free hair", otherwise known as an afro.:

That's all for now.  This topic is huge and could go on forever, but maybe if I can get to it sometime I'll post a how-to on some of our favorite styles.

Happy hair stylin'!

Seaside, Florida Is A Great Family Vacation Spot!

So the answer to yesterday's question of Where Have We Been?

is Seaside, Florida!

It is near Destin in the Panhandle of Florida on the Gulf side.

We drove there -- about 11 hours from our home in Texas.  Which is for us is really not too bad of a drive even with 4 kids!  This is the 2nd year we've done it and the kids have been really good for the drives (of course extra iPad, DS, and movie time in the car helps keep them happy campers!).  This year we drove through some rain both ways so there were more accidents on the roads creating traffic jams and about 5 hours into the drive home my husband was already wanting to schedule our airline flights there for next year.  But, my bet is in a couple weeks he'll forget the pain of sitting in traffic somewhere in Alabama and we'll drive again next time!

We had a wonderful time!  

I once heard someone say, "If you take a vacation with your kids that's not really a vacation, it's a family trip!"

And there is a lot of truth in that because as a parent there is still a lot of work to be done on a vacation when you have kids to care for.  They still need to be fed, bathed, and put to bed.  They will still fight and whine and misbehave just like they do at home only it irritates you more on vacation because -- "Hello!  We brought you here and you should be grateful and show it by not causing problems!" And trust me my kids have heard that lecture more than once on every family vacation we've gone on.

But. . .

A family trip to Seaside is the closest place I've been to achieving real vacation status even with my kids along!

Because it is just perfectly set up for families.  It is a really small town where you can walk everywhere.  The cars have to yield to pedestrians and mostly people just walk or ride bikes.  And a week of not loading and unloading my kids from the car is a great change of pace for me!!

Every house has a white picket fence 

You can easily rent bikes (they delivered them right to our beach house!).

We had a kitchen in our beach house and went to the grocery store to stock up on stuff for breakfasts, lunches, and a couple dinners.  I do not like family vacations where we have to eat out for every meal.  It is hard forcing kids to be good in restaurants that many times each day, no to mention the expense of our family of 6 eating out. Then when you do want to eat out, there are some really yummy restaurants you can easily walk to for dinner!

There is a gorgeous beach and also a nice pool to entertain and exhaust the kids:

One of the things I love about Seaside that really helps me relax and feel like I'm on vacation, is that there are no ugly cluttered shopping areas, no McDonalds and no billboards.  Everything is quaint, local, simple and beautiful.  I love the chapel:

Each house is unique:

You feel like you've stepped back in time!  Check out the post office:

Did you know the movie The Truman Show (with Jim Carrey where he is unaware that he is living in a reality TV show and his whole life is filmed) was filmed in Seaside?

It is an idyllic setting for sure!
 
There are even free movies on the lawn every Friday night.  My youngest cuddling up to her brother during the movie:

Ahhh, I miss it already.  Re-entry back into real life after vacation is rough, but I'm so glad we had that time to relax, unwind, and spend time together having fun as a family!

Where have we been?

I tricked you by auto-scheduling some posts last week, but we were actually away on vacation.

Where?

Obviously the beach, but what beach?

Would you like some clues?

The water was just this clear one day when the waves were quiet:

This was the view from the top balcony of the beach house we rented:

Last clue:

Here my daughter is standing in one of the iconic walkways down to the beach:

Anybody recognize it?

Stay tuned for the answer  . . .

Find more Wordful Wednesday here.

The Best Way to Enjoy a Hot Day

My Little Girl (the one on the right) demonstrates how to enjoy a hot day.

Step 1:

Step 2:





Repeat as necessary.

Why I send my kids to "Camp Mom"?

I posted a couple weeks ago about how my kids attend "Camp Mom" for several weeks during the summer where I entertain them (and they entertain themselves some, too!) instead of sending them away to summer camp or scheduling them for many different day camps and classes. 

One of the reasons I do this (aside from saving money so we'll have more to give away  -- even day camp is super expensive when you multiply it by 4 kids!) is so my 4 kids have time to play with each other.  We send them to public school and for us the pros of that have outweighed the cons but I do regret all the hours each day during the school year that they are away from home and away from their siblings.  I want my kids to be close to each other.

So, in the summer I try to give them a lot of room to be together.  Some days the fighting nearly drives me to second-guess that decision, but then I catch beautiful moments like this:

 Brothers playing baseball together all on their own, without my even suggesting it!

And I know it's worth it, all the work and patience involved in running "Camp Mom".

What Having 4 Kids Does to a House

Up until a week ago, a set of back doors to our house looked like this:

And the doors looked like that for a long time with the broken handles.  Months and months and months (we finally replaced them last week)!  And if you're counting there are several things like that about our house.  I call it the wear and tear of having 4 kids!

Because kids are not gentle with things like door handles and then there's just the shear number of people we have coming in and out of doors compared with a family of 1 kid for example.  The more kids you have, the more wear on your home.  It just is the way it is even if you teach your kids to take care of the house/be gentle, which we talk a lot about.  

And I know things could be worse around here.  Rules like no food or drinks besides water upstairs, no jumping on the couch, no throwing balls in the house, and eat only at a table help keep things in better order.  But still, there are worn-out and broken things and sometimes they bother me.  I'm embarrassed when a guest comes over.  But, we don't always fix things right away because we are busy and because sometimes we decide we'd rather give our money away to people with true need than fix up our good-enough house.

A couple weeks ago we visited friends who also have 4 kids, their youngest recently adopted from Ghana, and I smiled when I saw a few broken/worn out things at their house.  Really it was the biggest breath of fresh air!  When I go to a friend's house where everything is perfect, I come home and notice everything wrong with my own house.  But visiting this friend?  Made me feel like we were just a normal family living life with sometimes bigger priorities than a magazine-worthy home.  I drove home smiling thinking that maybe my house ministers to people who visit by making them feel better about their own homes!

What better way to celebrate America's Birthday?

We are so blessed here in America!

Blessed to be free.

Blessed with clean water pouring out of our faucets.

Blessed with free public education for our children.

Blessed to walk into church on Sunday without fear of being arrested.

Blessed to tuck our children in bed without worry that our village will be attacked by rebels in the night.

Blessed in most places with electricity, garbage collection, and police protection.

Blessed to have opportunity and hope for the future.

This July 4th, what better way to celebrate America's birthday than to give to people who do not have all the blessings we do as a country?

Because I am thankful for the men and women who fought for our country, who sacrificed for me, it makes perfect sense to honor them by sacrificing something myself for the good of others.

I've been talking all week about sponsoring a child in Ethiopia.  But, why the particular link I've given (http://www.hopechest.org/community/ketma/sponsor/)?  

Yes, I agree there are many wonderful organizations doing child sponsorship and doing it well.  We participate in three other programs.  But this one is a particular care point in a very needy community in Ethiopia.  Partnering with this Ketma Community (near Awassa if you are familiar with Ethiopian geography), you and I have an opportunity to not only change the life of one child, but to transform an entire community!  Children's Hopechest has done these care points in a few other places in Ethiopia (see this blog for more info. on the Kind Hearts and Trees of Glory CarePoints).  And after a few years, they have made a tremendous difference in the communities they are located.  Children are going to school, they have uniforms to wear, they are fed, they are learning about Jesus!  Schools have been built as well as water wells that the entire community can use instead of walking for hours each day to get clean water!  Elders in the community just marvel at the hope they now have for their once very impoverished areas!  Through the giving of regular people, God has transformed so many lives!  And now this Addis Ketma community is just getting starting and there is great hope for similar transformation and an opportunity for us to join in on God's work there.  I dream of clean water wells and a school for Ketma, but first we need to get more children sponsored!

We sat our kids down this past January and said, "You know some families save money for a boat or a lake house, but for us this community in Ethiopia is it. This is where we want to invest. And instead of someday being able to take our grandkids to our family home in the mountains or at the beach, our dream is for you to be able to take them to this place deep in Ethiopia and stare into the eyes of a community transformed, of children, now grown who got to go to school, babies who were able to grow up, to escape the 1 in 6 odds of dying before their 5th birthday because these children, God's children, were given food and medical care and clean water, all because we took fewer trips to Disney, drove older cars, bought fewer things, committed to no cable TV, and other life adjustments that pale in consideration to the struggles of so many people around the world. 

And so we are, giving enough that it hurts a bit, to this community in Ethiopia, so that they might live, while also planning a trip for some of our family next summer to visit this community, to hug those children and tell them of God's great love for them!

Tomorrow we will celebrate our great nation's birthday with our 4 kids, including our youngest, a proud flag-waving Ethiopian-American, and as we reflect on all the blessings we enjoy, we will also remember those outside our country who are without those blessings!

 

Find more Thankful Thursday here.

If you could choose . . .

Exactly two years ago we went here:

To Alaska.  On a cruise trip that was gifted to us by my dad and his wife, they had always wanted to go on a cruise with their children and grandchildren.  Alaska was beautiful, a trip of a lifetime and we were grateful for the experience.

Then one month later we went here:

The slums of Ethiopia.

And now, recently when my 10 year filled out an "About My Mom" card at school that he gave me on Mother's Day, there was a question, "If my mom could take a trip anywhere in the world, she'd go to _________________."  My son accurately said, "Ethiopia".

And it's true.  Ethiopia captured our hearts. 

Because of beauty like this:

and this:

Beautiful people with amazing joy in their hearts despite often horrific situations.

The poverty, the sickness, the orphans.  The problems of Ethiopia are huge.  But so is the hope.

Their lives can be changed for the better.  And you can be part of the solution!

Sponsor a child and give them not only tangible care in the form of food, clean water and education, but hope. 

An opportunity to change the world for $34 a month?  That works for me!

Just like I'd trade an Alaskan cruise for a trip to the slums and orphanages of Ethiopia, trading a bit of luxury in your own life to ensure life for another person, for a child, is a choice you will never regret!

Use this link to sponsor a child in Ethiopia.


Find more Works for Me Wednesday here and Wordful Wednesday here and Wordless Wednesday here.

You could change the world this summer!

When people talk about changing the world, do you immediately think -- too hard or not something I can do?

Check out this article from Christianity Today about the significant positive life outcomes for sponsored children.

We have sponsored children for a few years and even got to meet our boy Mathews in Ethiopia two years ago, and I can tell you the experience has definitely changed our lives for the better!

And the cost?  So small.  It costs more for my family of 6 to eat out at a basic restaurant one meal than it does to sponsor a child.  So my family of 6 decides to skip the restaurant one time during the month and instead we eat left-overs at home as a result a child living in poverty gets not only enough food for a MONTH, but clean water, access to basic medical care, education and the best thing -- discipleship!

Are you in?

There are several great organizations doing child sponsorship and doing it well.  We actually participate in 4 different child sponsorship programs as God has led us to sponsor additional children.  

There is a particular region of the world and a particular organization we have thrown part of our hearts into, though.  I'm going to post more on this tomorrow, but if you're looking for a child to sponsor now, today (and really, there is no better time to start!) then go here find a child that has "Unsponsored" under their precious picture and change the world for that child.

Did you go?  Did you click the link?  When I see their faces it sucks my breath away.  I feel like I'm looking into the eyes of my own children and it hurts.  Children should not go hungry!  Just should not happen!  And 1 in 8 children in Ethiopia die before their 5th birthday.  Can we all stand up and change that statistic?

You can change the world.

And after you do, keep it to yourself or come back and leave a comment letting me know, I'd rejoice over the news!