Monday, April 13, 2009

What a difference a year makes

So, as I posted this morning, my plan for the day was to take my 3 year old daughter and my 1 year old son with me to the grocery store and farmer's market because even though it was my 3 year old's normal preschool day, they were still on Easter holiday. But, as soon as I hit "post" on the blog and mustered the will to tackle my agenda for the day, the phone rang.

One of my daughter's friends wanted her to come over and play. I gathered that her mom was offering a playdate where I was fr
ee to leave so I agreed. The errands had to get done, so as much as I'd have liked to spend the morning watching my little girl play with her friend, I just couldn't today.

Now this would be my daughter's first playdate without Mommy staying with her.

A milestone hit a little earlier than her older brother did, but this other mommy is a friend I have known for a while and our girls know each other very well. My friend and I both have older boys so our girls are not the sheltered firstborns and we moms have figured out the magic that the drop off playda
te can be! Not that I don't enjoy some quality momversation during a stay and watch playdate, but the errands are a bit easier with one less child in tow!

Now, my little girl has had her bouts with being clingy, specifically a two and a half year bout that began when she was born and then some sporadic bouts since turning two and a half. But, she has become much more independent in the last year. Still, I wasn't sure if my leaving the playdate would f
reak her out or not.

I eased into it. "Guess what? L wants you to come play at her house. Do you want to go?" She replies, "Yes!" Okay, then let's get dressed.

I waited until about 10 minutes before we needed to leave to break it to her that I wouldn't be staying with her for the playdate. I a
ssured her that I'd be back in an hour and a half and that L's mom would be there and what fun it is to be a big girl and play at friends' houses without your mommy there! She seemed skeptical but bought into the idea. However there was still big potential for a freakout, crying, clinging fit once we got there and the reality of my leaving set in.

I pulled up to the house. My friend and her daughter came outside. We exchanged a little conversation about how our Easters were, then my daughter and her little friend took off running into the house and closed the door. My friend and I looked at each other and said, "Well, okay!"

That was it y'all!

No clinging, no crying, NOT EVEN A GOODBYE!

From the little girl I carried around on my hip for the first 2 and a half years of her life because she refused to walk or leave my side without major drama.

I wasn't sure if I should cry or cheer.

I drove off for the farmer's market with just my toddler strapped in the backseat and did a little of both.

Well, not really crying, but a moment of sadness fo
r the rapid growing up of my baby girl. But, also cheering and pride for the big girl she is becoming.

Such is the life of a mom. We are to work ourselves out of a job, to slowly, slowly, slowly make them more independent.

As much as we think we'd like to keep them babies by our side forever, this would deprive them from experiencing life, the joy of making their own way in the world, and fulfilling the destiny that God has for them. And deprive us moms of the blessing of watching it happen.

So this Gratituesday I'm thankful for God's design, because if I had my way I might just choose to freeze my little girl right here at 3 years old!

Find more Gratituesday at Heavenly Homemakers and Talk About Tuesday at The Lazy Organizer.


  1. It's weird when you leave them for the first time- you feel both relief and sadness at the same time. I've experienced a kid who I could leave with anyone (which is a little scary) and a clingy child who cried every time he was left at the nursery at church. Both are good for us I think :)

  2. Oh what a heart tugger. I am so glad that she was just fine. You are doing a great job giving your precious little girl the confidence that she needs to be more independent. Bravo.

  3. It is so bittersweet for me when my little ones pass a new milestone...turning six, their first visit to the dentist, learning to read or write, graduating high school... and everything in between. As you say-how exciting to watch them growing up and closer to the Lord. And yet, how sad to know they will soon move on without us. How precious.

  4. Don't blame ya for the freezin' wish. It goes fast. Mine was never a clinger...she would literally, at ONE push me out the door when she went to a friend's house and say, "Mommy Go! Mommy Go!" Somehow, I knew she'd fare well in life. LOL!

    Now my son? A clinger. And BOY did I miss it when it passed. TREASURE EVERY MINUTE and I KNOW YOU DO DEARIE!!!

  5. Love your blog. :o)

    I feel the same way about freezing time. I have a 12, 7 and 9 month old and it seems like the blink of an eye I was holding my 12 year old for the first time.

    Sad and happy feelings watching him grow into a young man.

  6. This is a great post. I always tell my oldest to stop growing, he can't have anymore birthdays. My youngest is still in diapers, so he can keep growing. I think three is about right.

  7. Isn't it amazing how tough they really are? How much we wrap ourselves around their/our insecurities. Boy, did I ever get a lesson in that today.

    Thank you so much for all your kind words and prayers today....I surely felt them!!!

  8. This is so fitting since my daughter will be turning 3 years old next Wednesday. I really enjoy seeing all of the "big girl" things that she is accomplishing, but still wish she could stay my "little girl" forever!


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