I'm not going to lie, this morning was one of the harder ones for me in terms of our adoption wait.
There were a variety of reasons, I'll list just some of them.
First, we are rapidly approaching ONE YEAR waiting for our referral for the child we will adopt from Ethiopia. One year into a wait that was averaging around 4 to 6 months when we signed up!
And, lately I've been bombarded with various sign-ups for next school year and I have no idea what next school year will look like for me! I don't know if I'll still have just 3 kids and with my youngest starting pre-K he'll go to school every day next year, just for 3 hours each morning, but still it will be the first time in the 8 years I've been a stay-at-home mom for me to have more than 2 mornings each week where all the kids are in school at the same time. Or, hopefully, prayerfully, we'll have our new daughter home from Ethiopia by then, in which case not only will she not be in school, but she will need nearly all of my attention for a long time! And then there's the fact that we don't know if she's going to be an infant or older toddler, and that affects what activities I can and cannot do next year as far as Bible studies, volunteer positions, activities for my older kids, etc., etc.! So, you see, the lack of ability to plan was beginning to get to me!
Already I'd adjusted to the summer being a big unknown. I haven't signed the kids up for any camps and we cannot plan any family vacation because we don't know when either of our two different trips to Ethiopia will fall! But now with the unknowns leaking into next fall and beyond, it just began to feel like too much. I'm more than happy to put my life on hold to help my new daughter adjust to her new life and family, but I'm tired of putting my life on hold to wait!
Have I mentioned before that I'm a planner, as in we found out the sex of all 3 of our biological children in utero because I needed to plan -- rooms, clothes, names, etc.!
It was a gray morning, unusually cloudy, and the frustration and depression over the adoption situation was definitely getting the best of my mood.
I checked my email right before lunch, hoping for news, there was none, sigh.
After lunch, my 3 year old and I made chocolate chip pumpkin bread and then I put him down for his nap while it baked.
I headed downstairs from tucking him in and the whole house smelled yummy like pumpkin bread, only it reminded me of Thanksgiving when I always make that bread and then all I could think about was how we really thought we'd get our referral, see the face of our new daughter, before Thanksgiving and here we are pushing Easter of the following year!
I sat down with my Bible and before doing my lesson for my Bible study, I turned and read randomly from Psalms. My eyes locked on Psalm 18:6, "In my distress I called upon the LORD; to my God I cried for help. From his temple he heard my voice, and my cry to him reached his ears."
It was just about an hour later I learned of some big, good news relating to our adoption. Not a referral yet, but a huge barrier holding up our adoption (and many others) has been cleared! Praise God for some much needed good news! Praise God for hearing our cries! Hurray!
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